Drew's Angle

The holidays are looming ever nearer, forcing me to re-evaluate my decision to spend as little time as possible in Malls. It is astounding to me that I’m seeing Christmas decorations up already, and it’s barely late November as I write this. I always thought Thanksgiving was the ‘official’ start of the Christmas shopping season. For me, though, it’s not Christmas until Max, the Grinch’s dog bedecked with a horn and reluctantly playing the role of reindeer, begins the downhill run with the giant sleigh behind him.

“All I need is a reindeer… The Grinch looked around. But, since reindeer are scarce, there was none to be found. Did that stop the old Grinch…? No! The Grinch simply said, “If I can’t find a reindeer, I’ll make one instead!” So he called his dog, Max. Then he took some red thread and he tied a big horn on the top of his head.

Then he loaded some bags and some old empty sacks on a ramshackle sleigh and he hitched up old Max.

Then the Grinch said, “Giddap!” And the sleigh started down toward the homes where the Whos Lay a-snooze in their town.”

What is it with Cincinnati drivers? They see ANY precipitation at all (be it rain, snow, or even FOG) and they slow down by 20 miles an hour. Which isn’t to say that they decelerate to 20 miles BELOW the speed limit; NO. These Dudley-Do-Rights never even HIT the speed limit when it’s a clear day. On a good day, they drive about 10 mph under, so any precipitation causes them to putter along at a blistering 34 mph. In the fast lane.

Thanksgiving. Ahh… Thanksgiving. The very word conjures images of crisply browned turkey skin, sliced to reveal tender meat underneath. Oyster dressing. The smell of pumpkin pie. Homemade rolls for chasing the last bits of thick brown gravy around your plate. Cranberry sauce. The inevitable food coma, during which I watch my single football game of the year. I hope your Thanksgiving is filled with family and friends.

See, the good drivers (I only know one person that fits into this category — ME) would like it if you’d just get out of the way and let us move past you. Then you can continue randomly weaving across lanes while you attempt to put on your eye makeup and talk on your cell phone. Just let me pass! And, for the sake of all that is good and pure in the world, use your darned TURN SIGNALS. They’re there to give your fellow drivers — those people that are in 2 ton machines that could run into you and make you spill your double-decaf soy vanilla latte all over yourself — the merest inclination as to the direction you intend to amble.

Do you love animals? I’ve always liked dogs, though I didn’t get my first dog until I was 12 years old. Ever since then, I’ve had at least one dog in my life. And now I’ve got four cats and two dogs, which I suppose is the by-product of sharing a house with a veterinarian. And what a bumbling circus of animals we’ve got! As I mentioned, there are 4 cats, but only 7 feline eyeballs. And only 6 of those feline eyeballs work. It just so happens that the non-working eye is also in the head of the one-eyed cat. Then there’s the cat that had a broken back, the cat with his heart in backwards, and the cat that is allergic to everything under the sun. Two dogs, with maybe one and one-third of a brain between them. But it’s a house full of love as long as none of the animals are sneezing, throwing up, running into walls, or falling down the steps.

Holiday Strata
12 Servings

6 Eggs, Lightly Beaten
1 cup Colby (Or Mild Cheddar Cheese),Shredded
2 cup Milk
1 teaspoon Dry Mustard
6 Slices Of Bread,Crusts Removed And Trimmed
1 pound Sausage,Fried & Crumbled
1 teaspoon Salt

Mix all ingredients. Pour into 9″ X 13″ pan. Refrigerate, covered, overnight. Bake at 350 for 35-40 minutes.

Perfect for holiday mornings — you assemble it the night before so you don’t miss any of the excitement!

Happy Thanksgiving!

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